Dealing with my body issues (cup A personality type?)

Believe me when I tell you I hesitated a long time before writing this post.

I mean a very long time.

I started this blog more than a year ago- and this is my first exposure- so to speak.

I will be turning 51 in September, and as I have told you in previous posts, the past year has been what I believe to be the most significant year of my life- in terms of personal development and goal achieving.

If you missed the leads- here are the links:

Making dreams come true at 50

The whole truth about early retirement.

13 days as a dhamma server in a vipassana course: what?? ( no preaching or missionary wisdom included)

How I improved my blood works results

So what now?

Now the time has come to deal with my body issues, apparently.

Well its summer here, meaning hot, really hot.

Even in the early hours, I run- 05:20-07:00 am- it is not easy already.

*Or maybe it’s just me, at my blessed age, going through “heat adjustments?”(possible- yet not the point so).

Yesterday I went out running wearing a sports bra, a tank top, and my running shorts.

And somewhere after 6 kilometers- knowing I have 6 more to go- I left my top on a bench near my house (my route is 4*3k, and every round comes near my house).

Wow. the feeling of liberation- running with only shorts and my sports bra.

Of course, it seemed like every person that passed me was giving me the eye- but I decided to ignore and keep enjoying myself.

But as soon as the runner’s adrenaline came down, the doubts came up.

What was I thinking running around half naked with my unsculpted -51-year-old- non 6 pack stomach for everyone to see??

And much worse- my cup A issues joined in as if there was some kind of cruel party going on.

I have had issues with my (very) small breasts ever since high school- when 97% of other girls had full cupped bras- and I stayed with my training bra.

I kept thinking: what is wrong with me?

I couldn’t even blame it on genetics- since my great grand mother-my grandmother and my mother- all have/had cup c-cup d bras.

For years I told myself all kinds of fairy tails to calm my hurt ego:

#1: small breasts=no sagging when I get older.

Well- not true.

I mean I guess less sagging than big breasts- physics 101 – gravitation and all that- but it’s not that everything is young and perky when you and your small breast mature.

#2: small breasts= small risk of breast cancer.

well- that is a myth too. (!!!)

I thankfully have no personal knowledge -only online searches confirmed this- but please don’t skip getting checked for breast cancer if you have small breast because you somehow believe in breast justice or whatever. 

But- bear in mind that a mammography screening with small cup A breast is as pleasant as shopping for a bra-

Last time I did that the technician squeezed and pulled so hard on my breast I almost swore it was the last time I was going through that thing.

But I will go get checked again next time, despite the huge inconvenience so to speak- because this is a matter of life and death.

#3: Small breast= better athletic performance- due to the lightness of your body. 

Well- this- also- is not true – at least for me. the secret for better athletic performance is your workout+rest+healthy eating, and not the size of your body -specifically your breast. again- this is my personal experience.

#4: The most attractive feature in a woman is her eyes, not her breasts.

emmmmmmmm……….right………

#5 There is a universal law that says that if you have small breasts then you will be skinny no matter what.

Again- a total myth. 

If you want to be slim- because that is how you perform better athletically- and mentally- then you need to eat healthy balanced portioned meals and workout properly- especially when reaching 50, and please don’t count on any universal justice or whatever to get you fit and drop the pounds for you just because as it happens you have small breasts.

For years I hated going shopping for bras, including swimsuits, and only when I turned 30 something I set myself free from that miserable experience where the sales lady opens your curtain and says : “oh no-this doesn’t fit either? ” then shouts to another sales lady 3 km from there:” she has really small breasts- do we have anything for her?”

The solution?

Training bras and one piece swimsuits.

Enough was enough.

But running only with only my yoga bra?? no way.

But last week I did it.

I am not confident enough to put a picture of myself here, maybe in time. I did get my partner to take my picture but had second thoughts -so not for now.

And yet- I strongly recommend every girl-woman to try this liberating feeling of running only with your sports bra.

I can tell you that over the years I became accustomed to my breasts and accepted my situation- even grown to like them.

I  haven’t reached the kind of breast love I saw when searching for a new sports bra last week ( not very frugal of me-I know- but I really enjoyed the liberating feeling and my yoga bra is sagging a bit) -during my online search on Amazon, I always read the reviews before buying anything- and the women there were writing comments like:” the bra is fine, the girls are in place”(the girls?? yes, the girls. apparently the breasts are girls, they never grow old, those peter pan creatures) …or “Thelma and Louise like the feeling of this bra” (Thelma and Louise. yes. great movie by the way. )

So no- I didn’t nickname any of my breasts- not Thelma- nor Louise, not Ginger- nor Fred.

But- I have befriended them, and feel good about myself, and- even ran only in my sports bra -great step for me.

I am linking a great post I found that definitely raises the important points relevant to this issue- our. body. image.it is called “how to run in a sports bra”-as simple as that.

how to run in a sports bra

Be free.

Be happy.

The cooliflower.

 

 

 

Published by wiseassvegan

an organized full time working vegan -with plenty of ideas on getting everything done in the most simple and efficient way possible.

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5 Comments

  1. This brings back almost 40 year old memories.

    In college, my fiancee and I would run a bit more than 20K each night (when it finally cooled to below 35C). When she ran, she wore a thin tight shirt under a thin loose shirt.

    I went with her when she was being fitted for nice clothes for medical school interviews and the lady measuring her came up with “30 and 30-1/2″ (inches) and then told her to just wear a camisole because they don’t make bras that small”.

    Her mom used to drive me crazy with, “You should go see a doctor to get something added up top. Don’t you want to attract a man?” Note that this was AFTER we were engaged. I guess her mom thought it was efficient to insult two people with one insult.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have 3 things to say:
      1.I’m still laughing , your MIL sounds like quite a lady, and like your comment about her minimalistic approach guiding her….
      2. There is a strong sense of share and support between you and your wife, and that, in my humble opinion , is the key for real love. A good sense of humor that allows you to dismiss life’s mischief with a Lough is useful too- I believe you two have it covered – judging by your comment.
      3.As always, thank you for reading and commenting, makes it so much nicer to write when people relate!

      Like

      1. Oooooops…sorry for jumping into conclusion…but somehow I believe you were able to take with you onwards your ability to be there for the people you care about , and your ability to reflect on unpleasant situations with a sense of humor .My apologies again for the mix up…

        Like

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